Choosing an Online Dating Profile Picture

June 27, 2009 by  
Filed under Online Dating

For many people, the real moment of fear in putting together an online dating profile is the selection of a photograph to accompany your self-description. Although a human being is very different from a saleable commodity, a dating profile is scarcely different from an advertisement. You want people to think you sound and look good. There is no point in putting together a profile that would make Oscar Wilde appear witless and uninspired if you use a photograph of you asleep on a beach somewhere. It may very well be funny, but you aren’t looking to get booked for a comedy club.

The best profile photographs are ones that strike a balance between being alluring and being human. Any number of online profiles are accompanied by pictures of someone who looks like a model. In most cases, this is because the person in the picture is a model. In these cases, the model is rarely the person who has put the profile together, and online regulars are wise to that. Don’t get done up to an unreasonable level before the photo is taken, either. Should you meet a potential suitor later on, you don’t want them to think “Actually, I think I preferred the photo”.

A picture which accentuates your best qualities and makes you look friendly is the best bet. Seeking to appear like a god or a goddess will create more problems than it is worth. You want someone to think “I could happily spend time with that person”, not be intimidated by your supermodel fierceness.

Creating an Online Dating Profile – The Dos and Don’ts

June 27, 2009 by  
Filed under Online Dating

  • Do choose a photograph where you are well-dressed. It is not necessary to get dressed up and have a photo taken professionally, but one where you are wearing a faded t-shirt and a hat shaped like a beer can won’t do.
  • Don’t lie to make yourself appear more impressive. If you are going to be dating someone who has read your profile, at some point they will get to know the real you. If they find that you lied in the first place, they will lose a lot of trust in you.
  • Do make your personality come across as well as possible. If your sense of humor has been complimented by a lot of people, make a few self-deprecating jokes. Nothing that comes across as self-pity, and equally you should avoid coming across as arrogant. “I’m an international business tycoon – I’ve sold DVDs online to people in Japan and in Brazil” – something unfunny but cute like that works wonders.
  • Don’t sound desperate or resentful if you haven’t had good luck before. A comment like “Are there any good men/women out there?” makes it sound like you are bitter. Even if your past hasn’t been glittering, good people exist. They won’t be attracted by self-pity, though.
  • Do make yourself sound fun. This does not mean liberal use of exclamation marks and the word “crazy”, however you choose to spell it. Talk about things you enjoy and appear passionate. There are few things more attractive than someone who is enthusiastic and literate.

The Drawbacks of Online Dating

June 27, 2009 by  
Filed under Featured, Online Dating

It is difficult to meet the right person in this day and age, and is not made easier by the pressures placed on us not only by friends and family, but also by most television shows and print media, a fair percentage of songs, books and films, and almost every advertisement you see. It is easy to understand why people will look to the Internet to solve the problem. Being able to use the Internet to look for love removes a lot of the hurdles from the process. However, the process is far from foolproof.

Even before Internet dating became a popular method of looking for the right person, there was a swell of opposition to it. Someone who appeared charming and well-mannered on the Internet could, it was argued, be horrible in person. The Internet allows a certain amount of your character to stay hidden. The old cliché of a 53-year-old man posing as a 21-year-old may be a well-worn one, but only because there have been cases where that exact thing has happened – and worse things than that are not unknown.

Even if a potential dating partner does not deliberately mislead with their profile, they can turn out to be missing a certain spark “in the flesh”, sometimes because their personality comes across better when they have time to think about their responses. Some people are just shy. If you persist with them, they may come out of their shell – but a judgement call has to be made at some point, and you cannot wait forever for that glowing personality to replicate itself in the here and now.

The Advantages of Internet Dating.

June 27, 2009 by  
Filed under Online Dating

Online dating has come a long way since the early part of the decade, when people would often react with horror if you so much as suggested dating someone from the Internet. “They could be anybody!” was a common refrain, not to mention the impression that people had of regular Internet users – generally an unflattering one to say the least. Even couples who met over the Internet and went on to hit it off fantastically well would, more often than not come up with a cover story to avoid the mockery of others. Today, that has changed to a large extent.

Online dating site memberships have gone through the roof in recent years. Meeting someone new can be very difficult in the everyday situations we all face. Finding love in the workplace can be tricky, all the more so if an intended suitor rejects your advances, or worse still if you date for a while and then break up – always a difficult situation. Meeting someone online allows you to take things at your own pace, takes a lot of the awkwardness out of giving good or bad news, and allows you to pull the plug if someone who seemed charming turns out to be awful.

Online dating sites also allow you to hone your search for the right person. If you have a specific “type” of person that you prefer to date, you can specify that your search results include only that type of person. Maybe it removes some of the romance and the thrill of the chase, but it improves the chance of meeting the right person.

Online dating – turn on, log in , find love

June 27, 2009 by  
Filed under Online Dating

The advance of the Internet in our society has had many positive and many negative effects. Although it allows us to make contact with people on the other side of the world as easily as talking to a friend who lives just across the street, it also has been known to introduce a layer of insulation between people, almost putting up barriers to real, substantial connection and human interaction. All of this depends on the individual, and one person’s positive experience is another’s nightmare. At the base of it, only you can decide what you get from the experience.

Online dating has grown as an option for people searching for love in the past decade. Most usually this will be operated through a dating website. To use a dating website effectively you must create a profile which explains a little bit about you – your age, interests, a bit about your daily life and your hopes for the dating experience. You should also include a picture – in which your face can be seen and you are not doing anything potentially off-putting. Many people will surf through tens of profiles that they do not like before selecting one they do like. It pays to maximize your chances.

When you happen upon a profile for someone who appears to have dating potential, you can send them a message and if they reply, you can begin to communicate via e-mail, then possibly by telephone, leading up to a potential meeting. This needs to happen at a pace that suits both parties however – one being too pushy will crush all possibilities before they even begin.